The Generation Sandwich with a Side of Dog
If you’re in the sandwich generation, you know the weight of it. Like us, you are stuck between raising (or supporting) grown kids while also caring for aging parents. Ron and I are often pulled in a hundred different directions – like helping our kids with school issues or a recent heartbreak while a call is coming in from Ron’s mom because she forgot how to work her TV for the third time this week. It’s an exhausting, emotional, and sometimes overwhelming place to be. And yet, through all the chaos, we’ve noticed a constant that keeps us tethered to both our loved ones and our sanity: our dogs!
For many of us, our dogs are more than just pets—they’re the emotional glue that holds our family together. They provide continuity, stability, and an unwavering sense of comfort as we navigate the demands of being both caregivers and partners.
How Our Dogs Connect Us to Our Parents
As our parents have gotten older, they have all taken a keen interest in the lives of our dogs. In fact, for Christmas last year, my dad gifted us amazing portraits that he drew of Lewie and Mo that brought tears to our eyes.
The familiarity of a dog’s presence can be grounding for aging parents, especially as they face health challenges, cognitive decline, or the loneliness that can come with growing older. It gives them something to talk with us about besides their own issues and can add lightheartedness to our conversations.
For those of us taking care of aging parents, having a dog around can make caregiving just a little bit easier. Ron’s mom might not always remember to take her meds, but she always remembers who Lewie is and wants to know all about his day. And sometimes, that’s exactly what she needs—a moment of joy that has nothing to do with talking about doctor’s appointments or bills. We bring Lewie with us when we visit her in NJ, and Lewie greets her with the same enthusiasm every time - a reliable and loving presence that never changes. He also knows Grammy has the best treats!
Dogs Keep Us Tied to Our Kids
Even as our kids grow up and move away to college or out on their own, dogs remain a bridge to those shared memories of family life. Our kids grew up with dogs by their side - furry best friends, playmates, and constant companions who have been with them in times of sorrow, joy, and all their major milestones.
Part of our jobs as parents is to launch our kids from the nest, but that doesn’t mean we don’t want to hear from them! We’ve found that the surest way to hear from either of our kids is by texting pictures of the dogs. Picture sent = immediate response! The dogs are the unspoken thread that keeps us connected. They remind our kids of home, of safety, of comfort.
Even when our roles as parents shift, and our kids are making their own way in the world, our dogs are the constant that links us all back together. They provide an easy, lighthearted way to reconnect—sharing funny photos, sending videos, and recounting their latest antics.
Dogs Keep Us Sane
Most importantly, our dogs help us keep it together when things get crazy. They don’t ask questions or demand explanations when we’re stressed beyond words. They just are—loyal, loving, and steadfast. They get us outside, force us to focus on them, and remind us that, sometimes, life is as simple as a good belly rub and a wagging tail.
At those times when we have felt like we are struggling to balance the needs of our parents, our kids, and even ourselves—our dogs remind us that we’re doing okay. That we are loved. That at the end of the day, we’re still showing up, and sometimes, that’s enough.
Dogs can be more than just pets for those of us sandwiched between generations. They can be the tie that binds us to our family…and to ourselves.
Watch us sharing more thoughts of dealing with aging parents and kids and how our dogs help below…